The holiday season can make the loss or decline of a pet feel especially visible. Pets often appear in family routines and holiday pages, so their absence can sharpen feelings of grief. Augusta O’Reilly, a veterinary social worker at the Virginia–Maryland College of Veterinary Medicine, says many people experience anticipatory grief — the emotional reaction to an expected loss. This can include crying, thinking the pet may not be here next year, or feeling pressure to make the holiday perfect.
O’Reilly recommends simple, concrete steps to focus on the present and on the animal’s needs. People can make meaningful memories, for example by taking a holiday photo, creating a pawprint ornament, or wrapping a new toy for the pet. She also suggests finding quiet moments to notice paw prints or take a walk, and practicing mindful petting by stroking slowly and observing the pet’s muscles and fur.
For those who have already said goodbye, O’Reilly suggests starting traditions to honor the bond: light a candle or make a small altar, display past photos, write about the year and what the pet missed, or donate time or items to a local rescue in the pet’s memory. She adds that grief can feel isolating and encourages people to reach out to those who understand and support them. Source: Virginia Tech.
Difficult words
- anticipatory grief — emotional reaction before a loss happens
- decline — gradual loss of health or ability
- routine — regular activity done as part of liferoutines
- sharpen — make a feeling stronger or more intense
- mindful petting — slow, attentive touching of a pet
- altar — small structure for remembering someone or something
- isolate — feel alone and separated from othersisolating
Tip: hover, focus or tap highlighted words in the article to see quick definitions while you read or listen.
Discussion questions
- Have you ever felt sad about a pet at a special time like a holiday? What helped you feel better?
- Which memory-making idea from the article would you try with your pet and why?
- If you lost a pet, would you prefer to honor them by donating to a rescue or by keeping photos and small rituals? Explain your choice.
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