The holidays often heighten awareness of loss, and pets can be central to seasonal routines and family memories. Augusta O’Reilly, a veterinary social worker at the Virginia–Maryland College of Veterinary Medicine, explains that many people experience anticipatory grief — an emotional response to an expected loss. Typical reactions include crying, imagining the pet will not be present next year, or feeling pressure to make a last holiday perfect.
O’Reilly offers practical, mindful approaches to make the remaining time meaningful and to manage grief. Small, concrete actions help people stay present and attend to the animal’s needs. Examples include taking a holiday photo, creating a pawprint ornament, or wrapping a new toy or treat for the pet to open. She also recommends finding quiet moments to step aside, notice paw prints, or walk in the snow, and practicing mindful petting by stroking slowly while observing the pet’s muscles and the texture of its fur.
- Create a special space: light a candle or assemble a small altar with favorite items.
- Include the pet in decorations: hang ornaments or display past holiday photos.
- Write to the pet or record the year and note what the pet missed.
- Give back: donate time or items to a local rescue or shelter in the pet’s memory.
O’Reilly notes that grief over a pet can feel isolating and she encourages people to reach out to those who understand and support them. Source: Virginia Tech.
Difficult words
- anticipatory grief — emotional pain felt before an expected loss
- mindful — giving full attention to present actions
- attend — give care or attention to someone
- ornament — decorative object used in celebrationspawprint ornament, ornaments
- altar — small table or place for remembrance
- isolate — making someone feel alone or separatedisolating
- donate — give money, time, or items for help
Tip: hover, focus or tap highlighted words in the article to see quick definitions while you read or listen.
Discussion questions
- Which small rituals from the article would you find most helpful during a pets final months, and why?
- How can including a pet in holiday traditions change how a family remembers that pet later?
- In what ways might donating to a shelter in a pets memory help someone who is grieving?
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